Day 5

Forlorn yet a party....

So this morning I was rather sad.  I think not so much because I missed my coffee and usual breakfast but because I missed the routine of it.  I actually got back into bed after I got up and slept another 2 hours.  I was not tired.  I think I was depressed.  I am not making the most of all I have to eat - I can be just as creative with what I have available to me but I just don't feel the love.  Then I missed my Sunday morning coffee in bed more than you can imagine.  Tea just isn't the same.  

After a long while feeling sorry for myself, I got dressed and sat at the kitchen table with my detox literature and made a list of everything that I can eat starting Tuesday, which is day 7.  I still have a list of "core" fruits and veggies (while avoiding others), fish, legumes, oils, herbs and spices.  That's about it.  I am being so silly.  I can create lovely dishes with everything available to me.  But the other part of this puzzle is that I am just not hungry.  And on Day 7 I go up to three shakes a day.  I just do not know how I am going to do that and eat.  Right now I am planning to do a shake for breakfast, a substantial "real food" lunch, a shake for dinner and my third one in the evening.  Or maybe not.  I am also upping my activity (with a Fitbit that I got on Friday) so I might land up being hungrier than I would think.  

In any case... so last night I went to a party where it was all appetizers.  We brought some and the other two couples brought some, all keeping in mind my food limitations.  Let me just say that I enjoyed every morsel, did not miss a bite, and was too full when I got home to have my second shake of the day.  We brought hommos (which I could not eat because of my sensitivity to sesame seeds which is what tahini is made out of), foul M'dammas (which is fava beans and which was absolutely wonderful), spinach pie (which I did not eat), guacamole (which I could eat), and babaghanoush without the tahini (so grilled eggplant with lemon and garlic).  Other things that I could eat were grilled chicken legs, crudites, and a wonderful paleo risotto made with cauliflower, and fresh strawberries and pineapple.  There were only a few things that I could not eat. 

What is the harm in having "just one"?  I had a nice long running conversation with myself and said I would only be fooling or hurting myself to go off the list of allowed foods.  Like, why bother if I am not going to do this right.  Then I thought of my granddaughter, who is making her appearance in June, and said not only am I doing this for myself, but for my children and grandchildren.  And that stopped the pouting.

.... That and the fact that I am already almost at the end of week one, with ONLY three more weeks to go.  The worst of it is the following 10 days when the list of allowable food is really pared down, but I am determined to see this through.

Miriam