I am retiring this blog and invite you all to my new blog, Life Without Cookies.

Hope to see you there!

Miriam

Blood tests this time around

Okay - I only have a few days under my belt of low-carb eating but it is enough to know that I most likely will be successful with this.  It is an easy way to eat and I can honestly say it is the first eating plan in a LONG time that actually does feel like a long-term life-style change.  Plus, my commitment is about as strong as it has ever been. 

With that in mind I moved my blood tests and doctor's follow-up three months out so that the readings will be a true reflection of my dietary changes.  Furthermore, I cancelled my May 20th nutritionist appointment and the next one will be June 4th - giving me almost a full month of this way of eating so that I can go to her with any questions or concerns.

I feel that I am really taking charge of things.  Not that I haven't taken charge at other times in my life but this feels different. 

I stepped on the scale this morning and am down 5 solid pounds since my last visit with the nutritionist.  I am thrilled for the loss but I am still so far into the red zone that I can't get too excited yet, although I am encouraged. 

My meals have been loaded with vegetables.  What is working is to make a "mess" of veggies but how I have been doing them is like what I do to make soup, but then use only the veggies with about a cup of stock and some tomato sauce.  My last mixture was carrots, celery, onions, red chard, jicama, cabbage and mushrooms.  This morning I had it with extra sauce and two eggs on top.  At lunch I had it as a side with pastured chicken breast.  This evening I will make a stir fry with onions, peppers and mushrooms and coconut aminos (I don't touch soy products so use this instead of soy sauce).  Hubby bought and sliced the best watermelon and  honeydew so I am looking forward to that for dessert tonight.

Last night I stared longingly at the bananas but they are so high carb, and I have so much other fruit in the house there was no need to have one even though I had a hankering.  I also have been finding that I don't have the urge to eat at night.  When I do I will make it a piece of chicken or some other smart choice.  I haven't been doing so well with my water but at least I don't feel dehydrated as I had been.

Small steps grasshopper....

Wow - Coming to things on my own

Ted Talk on Carbs and Diabetes

"Reversing Diabetes starts with Ignoring the Guidelines"

I wish I could have inserted the PICTURE of the YouTube video but I am not that savvy - I am lucky if the link works. LOL

Where do I begin?  First of all I do have metabolic syndrome which means a lot of things including insulin resistance and pre-diabetes.  Most of my attempts to lose weight were coming from an everything in moderation standpoint.  What this means is, even if I had been able to lose weight all these years, I would have had my pre-diabetes and metabolic syndrome under control but they would have been under the surface as long as I was not appreciatively cutting back on my carbohydrate intake.

I cut way back on carbohydrates by adhering to the Paleo/Primal template but tubers are still allowed as well as other starchy vegetables.  When I speak of carbohydrates I am talking about (processed) grains, starches, sugars, etc. - not the carbohydrates that are in fruits and vegetables.  A no-carb diet would mean eating only protein and fat (since there are only three macro-nutrients: protein, fat and carbohydrate) and I hope no one would ever do that!  (As a matter of fact let me mention here, many people are not sensitive to carbs.  When I present my journey here I am speaking for myself and MY needs.)

From here I am going to go that extra step and cut out starchy veggies and going back on what I said yesterday about being able to control processed foods with traces of sugar (like catchup). I am going back to my original "absolutely no added sugars" stance that I had last year and did very well with.  The way I look at this, I originally cut out all sugar because I wanted to eliminate all cravings for it.  But just because I can control cravings even having these small amounts of added sugars, the issue is what it does to MY (blood) sugar.  

I was thinking this morning - why didn't any doctors or nutritionists hit me over the head with the concept of low-carb eating?  Well, first of all, except for my new health practice, none of my doctors or dieticians I have worked with are aware of the new science.  They still all recommend low-fat eating thinking that FAT is the culprit, and the removal of which is the savior of weight loss.  Second, my new doctors and nutritionists may have tried to put me on that road but I wouldn't have listened.  Both nutritionists have been extremely supportive of the Paleo template and both have given me pretty strict carb-limits.  But I never quite heard it presented quite like in that Ted talk above.  

And, even if I had, I would not have listened or cared - so ultimately I am not finding fault with any of the health care professionals I have dealt with over the years.  I had to find my own way and my own motivation.  

Anyway this is the first morning I am not having my cappuccino.  I miss it.  I think, though, that I will not miss the nausea that always accompanies it.  (I have tried substitute milks but they just aren't the same....) The thing to learn is to not just take something away but to replace it.  I am going to try out various teas to find something to hit the spot.  Right now I am having "Bullet-Proof" Chocolate tea.  It smells like when you drive through Hershey Pennsylvania!  But it doesn't quite do the trick.  Tomorrow I will try something else.  Maybe I will just evolve into having NOTHING in the morning - or maybe just a nice sparkling water.

Well yesterday was a successful low-carb day and I woke up this morning feeling better than I have in a long time.  I am looking forward to my pasture-raised chicken and salad for lunch today!

Miriam

My  day of reckoning. 

What do I mean?  My first Mother's Day as a grandma.  My first day hitting rock bottom in the way I feel and KNOWING that I am doing it to myself.  I know I have said it before or have told myself that before but this is the first time I have had the TOOLS to deal with it.  (Not a DIET to deal with it.)

I have been through a "Mindful Eating" course and am working with a nutritionist at my health care practice who has also worked on mindful eating programs and has written a marvelous book on the subject.  At my last meeting with her I begged her to let me count calories (well actually I can do whatever I want - but I asked if she would work with me in that direction).  She relented but said that she felt my life is bigger than that and I have the tools and resources to eat in other ways than measuring and counting.  Her push has been for a more plant-based way of eating (but not Vegan - just a conscientious practice of making my plate 50% - 75% vegetables.  

After a couple of weeks of doing it MY way I realize she was right and I was wrong.  I thought that mixing counting with mindful eating would be a perfect meld of the situation, but I am reminded of all my attempts to meld - instead of just doing the work.  I need to meld mindful eating with mindful eating.  And that mindful eating must include more plant-based meals.  It is the only thing that I can see as sustainable in the long run.

I also have been reading Garden Girl's blog over and over and over again.  My takeaway is that I need to think for myself and do what works and let go of what doesn't work.  A Paleo "template" works for me.  Being grain-free works for me.  Being dairy-free is harder but works for me.  Being (for the most part) sugar-free is easy for me and works for me.  (The "for the most part" is because I am able to eat things with a low sugar count - such as a good quality catchup - but I cannot eat sugar in baked goods or having sugar-contain products more than a couple of times a week, if that.)  Limiting myself to 2 fruits a day (because of my blood sugar reaction to them) is not so easy, but works for me.  Drinking more water (not easy for me) works for me.

Eating everything in moderation does NOT work for me.  Eating at night after dinner does NOT work for me.  Going along with the gang and taking a vacation from GFSF (grain-free sugar-free) eating does NOT work for me. Coming home and getting in my nightgown and onto my iPad before dinner does NOT work for me! (LOL - you think?) 

What does work?  Blogging works for me because staying away from it means that I am staying away from the truth and it means that I am tending to lie to myself.  Decluttering and downsizing works for me because as I am clearing out physical clutter I find myself clearing out food and emotional clutter.  I have been fascinated by the changes in me and my perceptions since beginning my downsizing projects.

Anyway - I hope to be back often.  It will be a sign that hitting rock bottom paid off and that I am on my way up.

.

LAST day and on to a NEW START

Well I made it ... almost perfectly.  I told the dietician today that the worst day (ending up in a binge) was the day I transitioned from 2 scoops x 3 to 1 scoop x 2.  I told her it was the first time in three weeks that I was hungry and when I walked through the door at night I hit the kitchen and didn't leave until it was bedtime.  She is going to do some research on the available protein shakes and recommend one for me to have as my afternoon snack on the way home from work.  Just getting rid of that afternoon hunger will work wonders.

So we got started on real eating today.  It was only a half-hour meeting so we didn't go into depth (I have a 2 1-hour meetings coming up and we will go into more depth).  The highlight of it is to count carbs for starchy vegetables, fruits, and any non-gluten grains that I might eat.  20g for each meal and 10g for each snack.  Of everything I have ever counted in  my life carbs has not been one of them so it something totally new for me.  Also fruits are limited to two a day, and the carbs are so limited all in an effort to get my glucose lower.  It was 112 at last testing and the doctor said they look for 75 (yikes! I have never seen that number!).  She said it would also be great to have at least 18g protein at each meal.

I am also going to experiment bringing the following into my eating: eggs (YAY!), beef, pork and cashews.  The dairy she wants to put off for at least another 60-90 days.  Surprisingly enough I am not sensitive to ALL cow's milk dairy.  I can handle Swiss cheese of all things.  She said that in addition to the dairy sensitivity that I do have that dairy causes inflammation.  On the way home I shopped for goat cheese, sheep's milk pecorino and organic cheddar.  I am not going to go overboard on any of them but a little bit goes a long way just a small addition to a salad.  Alas, my cappuccinos must wait BUT she told me of a way to make a latte that I am going to try. Oh - I bought an egg replacement powder that I am going to use with my morning muffins.  If it works well I actually won't be in any rush to add bak the eggs.  AND I can use ghee as long as it is casein free - got that too.

I was concerned that I would have to count carbs in green vegetables but I don't so that will make cooking easy and I can get back to my creative Paleo ways.

So all in all, a good experiene.  My goal was to blog throughout the detox and I have and now I am going to take a break while I figure things out.  I will be back periodically to update my experience (maybe) - thank you for thoseo who have followed along up to now and for offering your encouragement.

Thank you!
Miriam

Where did the time go? I am at day 27

Almost finished!  I think I must have miscounted somewhere along the way because I am at day 27 today and tomorrow is THE END.  

I had one near miss, one collision and one fatality this weekend.

The near miss was that yesterday was Sunday morning, I was so desperate for my relaxation "ritual" so I poured a cup of coffee, added my creamer, Splenda and Starbucks flavoring.  I put it to my lips and took a small sip.  I looked at it and said - what would be the point... and poured it down the sink.

The collision was that yesterday was our Passover Seder.  I made a chicken dish that I couldn't eat (because there was sesame and sugar in the sauce).  With all the recipes and cooking I do you would think I would have made something "safe" but all I could think about was how I was going to have my cousin's wonderful brisket.  I don't know how many of you are familiar with the goings-on at a Passover seder but from appetizers to desserts probably no less than two dozen different foods hit the table.  I had NOTHING but the steamed string beans that I brought (I did have a shake on the way there so I was sure to not be hungry!) and two pieces of brisket.  As I raised the fork to my mouth my husband quietly said, "I thought you are not supposed to be eating beef."  I didn't even THINK of that ... all that was on my mind was NOT eating the chicken!  Let's just say I savored every single bite of that brisket - guilt free, knowing that there probably was little damage done since I had eaten NOTHING else from the meal.  (Side note:  I was extremely gassy all night which has not happened since starting the detox... which either means that the beef FINALLY got things going or that my stomach was complaining about having it added back... the two might be one and the same! I will ask the dietitian tomorrow.)

The fatality was those darn cookies after I was already ready for bed.  However, I did not have a huge binge.  Just a few.  But I also had a small amount (I swear) of chocolate covered raisins.  In one of the programs I have worked with this past year, the teacher says "Of course you eat at night.  You are so exhausted from being good all day."  You would think after being good all day I would have stopped myself.  But I just had a little bit (HONEST) and didn't feel bad about myself.  I wonder what the dietitian will say tomorrow - if she follows the 80/20 rule - or even 90/10.  If I had outright allergies I would be stupid to put myself in harms way, but I am curious whether there will be a little leeway once I get started on normal eating.  

The thing of it is, once I am off detox and can go back to my full Paleo cooking I am pretty sure that I won't be having (too many) lapses into sugar and flour because I will be so much more satisfied during the day.  I won't be fighting to stay on a restricted program.  I am actually very proud of myself.  I can count on one hand the number of times I went off the program (three being yesterday and a fourth when I had that horrible binge last week).  Other than that I have been true to the program - even way better than the 90/10 rule would be.  I had someone compliment me today on sticking to the program.  I am happy to say I basked in the compliment of the 90% instead of bringing up the 10% and hanging my head!  That in itself is an accomplishment.  

Tonight I am going to take out some of my favorite Paleo cookbooks and bring them to my appointment.  I am hoping that I can go back to full Paleo eating, with restrictions only on the worse of the offenders (eggs and honey... unfortunately very important...).  I am sure I will have to restrict the full sensitivity food list but I am hoping that we are talking moderation and not total cutting out.  We shall see...

Miriam