Finally understanding Intuitive Eating

         So this was my latest project (below).  I am working on finding myself with Intuitive Eating.  I've been working with a counselor since before my trip to Italy, but I could not bring myself to agree to that which is the foundation of all Intuitive Eating:  Principle #1: REJECT THE DIET MENTALITY.  My desire to reject the diet mentality dates back to many many blog entries ago when I said that I knew in my heart that I should be able to trust myself after all these years, but after years and years of dieting (my mother dropped me off at a Weight Watchers meeting in 1969!) I could not shake the core belief that I must follow a prescribed diet in order to lose weight.  Moving into Intuitive Eating is an entire paradigm shift which I was not ready for.  I did a lot of hard work trying to figure out how to let Weight Watchers go.  I wrote page after page of pros and cons of each; I wrote a long LONG letter to "Dear Diet" - in which the diet was able to answer me back as long as I got the last word; and I worked on the venn diagram below. I think that I've found the path to meld what I've learned all these years through Weight Watchers tools, while at the same time letting  go of the diet mentality to start the journey of Intuitive Eating.

         I think that most people (myself included) have misunderstood Intuitive Eating to mean: Eat whatever you want, whenever you want, until you are satisfied.  That is a recipe for gaining weight and learning nothing. What I have found in my work on Intuitive Eating since July is that I need to stop and think about what would really really satisfy me, make sure I am hungry - but do wait if it is only an urge or a craving, make sure that I am feeding physical hunger, and learn the cues for what "being satisfied" means.  It also means really tuning into my body signals to figure out that tipping point where it's too much, or not really the food that my body wants.  The more I tune into those signals the more I can make decisions.  If I eat a HUGE salad with some protein and a wonderful dressing I feel GREAT!  If I eat even a medium portion of lasagna I tend to fill immediately and feel uncomfortable afterwards.  These are signals that I never listened to before.  So even though I want lasagna and can eat it if I want I also have to respect my body and have just a little piece (even if in points-speak I have 15 points to "spend") and absolutely stop before I am satisfied/full because I know from experience I will not feel well later.  So IE really isn't a free-for-all.  You still have to respect certain things about how, why, when and how much you eat.

          I've also done a lot of hard work on the relationship between emotions and eating.  A diet will teach you to reach for "non-damaging" foods when you have an emotion you need to stuff down.  How many carrots and celery and heads of lettuce (and in really desperate times how much candy and chips) have I eaten instead of sitting quietly with the emotion, identifying what it is, and either letting it pass or thinking it through, maybe reframing how you feel about it or finding solutions for it?  IE isn't about eating a bag of baby carrots because you need the crunch to work out the anxiety or anger or nervousness. It's about sitting with those emotions and riding them through WITHOUT food.  IE is hard hard work.  Much easier to bowl through a bag of carrots (if you are out of points) or chips (if you have plenty of points).  I'm not saying that diets encourage you to eat your emotions, but they are less instrumental in having you work with them and more instrumental in helping you find ways to find less "damaging" foods. 

        Anyway, from here on this blog is going to take an Intuitive Eating twist.  I really feel that this is the way "normal" people do it.  And, as I am now in my 60th decade, I think it's time to learn what it is to be "normal" and stop the diet madness.

IT ZIPPED!

I am home from the wedding, and despite some real fear to the contrary, the gown zipped up.  A little too much flab hanging over the back (but I won't keep or post pictures taken from behind) but I did feel great!  Here is a picture of me and my daughter:
The three days before the wedding, in Florence, I was really scared to eat because I knew there was barely enough fabric to go around, but just as well.  The food there was wonderful and it would have been easy to overeat.  Instead I ate till satisfied, and was rewarded - not just with the fact that my dress fit, but I was not sick from stuffing myself.  I did, however.... enjoy every morsel after the wedding!
What I found very interesting is that each morning there was a HUGE breakfast served at the hotel and I did eat whatever I wanted (but not breads and pastries) and I did not feel like eating until dinner.  A few days I had a small gelato for lunch.  It was just very interesting that with no clock (I travel without a watch, camera or phone, believe it or not!) and eating when, where and what we felt like eating, we all ate good solid breakfasts, little or no lunch, and a late dinner.  How is it when I eat the same thing for breakfast but am sitting at my desk in the office, I can't wait for lunch and eat dinner the minute I barge through the door at night?
Anyway, I am meeting with my counselor this afternoon.  I had such pangs of wanting to go back to dieting when I got home, but have been resisting, and promised myself that I wouldn't until I saw her this afternoon.  I know that dieting is not the way to go (I am good lately for less than 24 hours!).  I also know that no number on the scale or size on the dress truly reflects who I am, how my relationships are (picture of me and hubby above), what a valuable member of society I am, or how I relate to my children.
I am going to try to recreate the way I ate in Italy - it was such a free-spirited way to be, and there is no reason I cannot recreate that at home.  Of course it helped that we walked miles and miles (and DIFFICULT miles) every day.  It would be nice to recreate that as well.
I am looking forward to my appointment this afternoon because... guess who is turning 60 on Friday?... and I cannot go through another year the way the past 50 have played out with my eating habits.  (Maybe even longer - I was fat way before age 10!)

Anyway - welcome back to me!
Miriam

uh oh.... hmmm....

I went to the seamstress yesterday and my dress doesn't have a millimeter to spare.  I can't afford to gain an ounce.  If I hold my own I'm fine, although I can barely breathe - but at least it can zip and still looks good.

Time for some creative work here - how do I watch what I eat but not diet?  I am committed to not dieting but I have to keep an eye on choices and quantity.  I am not going to count calories or Points, or even keep a running total in my head.  This will be a true test of listening to my body - if I listen and do not eat out of emotional hunger and keep my portions where they do not stuff me, I should do okay. 

I don't have the luxury this month of "experimenting" and I am committed to IE without dieting.. 


If you can't offer suggestions, at least please offer your prayers! lol

Miriam

Having Fun making my menu

I have been doing a lot of hard work and introspection working on my Intuitive Eating journey but I just finished a fun project.  I had to list all my favorite foods (well there are too many to list!) that I would like to have for my meals.  I found that, even though I am giving myself permission to eat anything, when I made my menu it was all healthy anyway!  What a surprise. I found that I am extremely content with my breakfast and lunch menus and don't need any other variety than that, but that I love to try new recipes so the dinner menu will always be changing.  But the biggest thing I learned with this exercise is, that for me, there is a big difference between a snack and a treat.  In separating the two I bring awareness to whether I am eating from hunger (snack) or whether I'm eating "just because."  If I allow myself the "just because" treats once in a while (or even every day!) then I think I will cut down on the snacking and eating at night, because sometimes it is just about the food!

 Here's my menu:

Miriam’s “current choice” MENU

(Dinner selections, especially, subject to change and augmentation based on latest favorite recipes!)

Breakfast Selections

·        Choice of Fresh Fruit or Melon

·        Wasa crackers with Lite Laughing Cow cheese topped with fresh cucumbers and tomatoes

·        Lite Feta cheese rolled with fresh mint and cucumbers

on fresh pita bread

·        Whole wheat bagel with natural peanut butter                        topped with fruit spread

·        Hearty soup or stew with cheese and whole wheat bread

·        Small portion of soup (without cheese or bread) as a side

·        Tosca Reno’s carrot bread spread with Lite Laughing Cow Cheese

·        2 egg omlette with fresh vegetables: onions, peppers, mushrooms and spinach with lite mozzarella cheese

·        Egg salad made with lite mayo, served with whole wheat toast or in a sandwich with Spring lettuce mix

·        Breakfast casserole made with eggs, whole grain bread, onions, mushrooms, spinach and topped with lite mozzarella cheese and turkey sausage

 

Lunch Selections

·       One slice fresh pizza (any kind) with a small side salad

·       Large salad (dressed with olive oil and seasoned rice vinegar) served with grilled chicken, steak or salmon

·       Various “mayo” salads: Tuna, seafood, salmon or chicken made with lite mayo, chopped vegetables and sugar-free relish (served with or without whole wheat bread). Served with a side of sliced fresh vegetables: carrots, celery, multi-colored peppers, cherry tomatoes

·       “Volumetrics” Asian chicken salad

·       Homemade soup (side portion)

·       Choice of fresh fruit or melon

·       Choice of small lite popcorn or individual bag of Veggie chips or straws

 

Dinner Selections

·        Steamed fresh vegetables

·        Creative Pilafs with quinoa, couscous or brown rice                       

·        Grilled or baked potatoes, sweet potatoes, or purple potatoes

·        Salad with raisins, walnuts, lite feta cheese and tossed with olive oil and seasoned rice vinegar

       

·        Grilled pork tenderloin

·        Roast or grilled chicken

·        Grilled shrimp

·        Grilled or baked salmon or other fresh seasonal fish

      

·        Lentil or other assorted stews with melted cheese and toasted whole grain breads

·        “Volumentrics” Spaghetti Bolognaise (with or without whole wheat spaghetti or other pasta)

·         

·        “Emily Bites” Lasagna

·         

·        “Hungry Girl” Bacon cheeseburger casserole

·         

·        “Hungry Girl” Inside out cheeseburger, grilled

 

Snack Selections

(to be eaten when hungry)

·        Fruit

·        Popcorn

·        Peanut butter crackers

·        Soup/stew (small portion)

·        Sliced lite deli (turkey, ham, roast beef) with or without a wrap

·        Oatmeal

Treat Selections

(for no other reason than I want it!)

·        Sherbert – specifically Friendly’s “Wattamelon” Roll

·        REAL ice cream cone

·        (to be added)