Day 3 of 100: DO IT ANYWAY

So - after much redirection and recalculating (and a decision NOT to prepare anything) I had a nice lunch with my mother and siblings.  I landed up getting a Trader Joe's hommos wrap with a bag of Weight Watchers baked multigrain crackers, and TJ's peach salsa and carrots.  I bought some TJ's lemon squares, quite impressed by their 80 calorie count, but when I opened the box and found that were about 3/4" square I decided they were definitely not worth the cost - except now I have 2 unaccounted for points left over.  I'm sure I'll find something!  AND, I don't even feel the need to continue eating (which I usually do after these lunches).  I think it is because I was in control of my lunch.

So today's "lesson" is "DO IT ANYWAY" - Linda gave two lists of characteristics: one for people who are "interested" and one for people who are "committed."  The list of the committed actions list was:  "Stick to their plans no matter what; Take action whether they feel like doing it or not; Assume that if they stay motivated results will follow; Take responsibility for their own actions; and Keep going in spite of challenges and setbacks. 

She asks you to identify a task you don't feel like doing, and do it anyway.  I think for myself it's using my bike DAILY, and drinking more water.  I NEVER feel like doing either of those things.  But on my path to "do it anyway" I will.  And, as I said in an earlier entry... I can certainly do it just for today.  I am not going to worry about tomorrow ... or the rest of my life.  She also says: "Notice how it feels to accomplish a goal by taking a "no matter what" approach to it.  I can identify with that immediately just with how I felt after lunch today.  It would have been easy to join in (OMG - my brother put out such a spread!) and to say that I didn't feel like eating the lunch I brought for myself.  But I brought a lovely lunch, and I had it and enjoyed it, and didn't even look at the other possibilities on the table.  And I DO feel good! 

Tomorrow I am going wedding gown shopping with my daughter!  Her wedding is going to be in Tuscany in September.  I'm not going to have a typical "mother of the bride" dress - I figure if I am down at least 20 pounds I should be able to find something lovely at Macy's - or even TJMaxx or Marshalls. (Did I already write that in another post?  sorry!)  Everyone is asking me if I've started shopping for a dress yet.  Even if I wasn't on a diet I would not be shopping in January for a dress I'm wearing in September! -- But I bet I'll be mighty happy to be doing my shopping in July or August -- especially if I stick to a "DO IT ANYWAY" way of life!

Happy day!
Miriam

Day 2 of 100 - Redefining Yumminess

Today's question:  Are you interested or committed?  Good question.  I think THIS time around what is different is that I am committed.  I know I say that all the time... but what's the difference? - Redefining yumminess.  Whether counting calories or points, the bottom line is that I was always interested in how I could fit in a candy bar, or a decadent dessert, or eating out often, or tweaking my weigh-in days so that I could eat as much as I wanted but have a few days to almost make up for it.  I was interested in how many excuses I could come up with to explain why my weight loss was slow, or what would be a really good reason not to follow a diet at all. 

This time I finally get it.  It IS a lifestyle change in the way I eat.  It sort of does make me sad, but it makes me happy as well, because I finally understand the difference between being interested and being committed.  This is not to say that I can't have candy or dessert, or eat out, or skip an occasional weigh-in because of an over-indulgence.  But it means that I have to realize it is a different game that I have to play.  And I can have fun.  Really I can.  Not just shopping for healthy food (yes, I'm one of the few people that absolutely loves grocery shopping!) and finding new recipes, but I found today that I even enjoyed planning my meals for tomorrow. 

I am faced with a challenge tomorrow: I'm going with my brothers to visit my mother in her nursing home for lunch, which we bring.  I actually do this every week, but have never done it while committed to my weight loss plan.  At work I have soup, salad, several fruits, and a casserole or protein that I heat in the microwave.  When I go to my mother's there is no fridge or microwave, so we always just bring cold lunches (the one time we brought in Chinese food it was just too complicated).  Either my brother or I bring potato salad and coleslaw, sandwiches or bagels, desserts, chips, pretzels, etc.  And we eat and we enjoy.  So for tomorrow I told him to bring his own lunch (and for my other brother who is visiting) and I would take care of myself and my mother (sadly, at this point, she could eat cardboard and not care - I spent a lot of time at the beginning bringing her all her favorite foods but it doesn't matter anymore).  I'm packing a totally on-program lunch, including a big mug of soup that I will heat and eat in my office BEFORE going over.  I am also packing carrots and celery sticks because I will need a lot of crunch. Anyway - I mixed and matched all my options for tomorrow - from breakfast through dinner - so I would eat just what I wanted to eat, and still be satisfied.
Commitment.

So redefining yumminess?  That's another fun part of this process.  I just did my version of a 1-minute muffin, except it came out like a cake and it's wonderful.  Not Cheesecake Factory cheesecake wonderful.  Not even close.  Looking through interested eyes I wouldn't even give it a second glance.  Looking through committed eyes, I can't wait to have it again.  It's not that I am going to eat foods that I don't like - it's just that I am willing to be open to new tastes and textures and give things a second try.  I'm willing to redefine yumminess.

I hope I can stay awake tonight for the chat at Blog to Lose.  It's 10PM - WAY past my bedtime, but I'll aim to be awake.  I got so much from Mondays' chat I don't want to miss it tonight.

Have a committed day everyone!
Miriam

Day 1 of a 100

I think I mentioned in an earlier blog about Linda Spangle's "100 Days of Weight Loss" as a supplemental motivational program that can be used with any diet program.  I know that Flo and Jan are using it, and I started with a friend, Cyndy.  I started before Christmas, then we lost our way and have begun again with Day 1 today.

The first day is to write your answers to: "I used to be that way but now I'm this way."  How did you used to be and what are you going to do different this time?  The first time I approached this I had a huge laundry list.  After my experiences yesterday the answer was a short one: I am going to take one day at a time.  PERIOD.  I think one of the reasons I haven't been successful up to now is that I got very caught up in the future:

Would I be dieting forever?  How on earth could I weigh and measure and track my whole life?  Would I ever know what it means to have a normal food life?  How can I live with rules and various deprivations? What if I'm hungry?  What if I'm bored?  What if I want to eat the universe - and do?

After my chat yesterday on Blog to Lose, I came away with a new sense of "Just for Today."  I wiped off the white board on my fridge and planned my meals JUST FOR TODAY, and posted them on the white board so that when I got up this morning I would have an immediate map of where I am going.  Of course, since I only shop and cook once a week, I can't exactly go day-by-day but with many choices available to me, I can make that decision the night before for the next day.  I can also get in tune with what I feel like having - what I am in the mood for, what I haven't had for a while, if I need to get out of a rut.  I just felt so good about today.  I can do anything for one day.

Sandy (my sister knee-replacement blogger) reminded me that I would get in the same trouble as before with my walking, if I attacked 5 flights of stairs right out of the box.  So, once she put some sense in my head, I fabricated a new plan of attack, which I started today.  We have an exercise bike in the office that I haven't used.  So today I took {one flight of stairs up and down + 5 minutes on the bike} x 2.  My ultimate goal is to do that 4 times a day plus add 20 minutes at home on my own bike.  I can do that.  JUST FOR TODAY!!!!  And, if I'm successful, I can do it tomorrow again!

Thanks for commenting, Beth, Kathy and Elaine - it's nice to know you're reading this blog!  And Kathy - Not a clue where the vegetables turns from a yellow turnip to a rutabaga.  Maybe the Mason-Dixon line?

Miriam

A wonderful productive day

Hello everyone!  I decided that if I ever had the option of a 4-day work week I would rather have Mondays off than Fridays.  The entire weekend was relaxed knowing that I had today off too.  I got so much done in the kitchen today - and it was so relaxing - not like my usual Sundays where I feel so under the gun to get everything done.  Today I made the Italian soup - I didn't care for it as much as my own soup, but I don't blame the recipe: I had bought crushed tomatoes by mistake when it called for diced, and so the strong tomato taste was over the top.  I could have tried to thin it with more broth, but then all the other flavors would have been diluted.  Note to self: There IS a difference between crushed and diced!

Then I made my breakfast casserole.  It was supposed to soak overnight, but I baked it along with my chicken for dinner, and it came out just fine.  Then I did bake my chicken, prepare a huge salad which I divided between what I'll take for lunch tomorrow and what I had for dinner tonight.  I packed four bags of Ziplock steamer bags as well as one with yellow turnips.  I made 8 containers of the dry ingredients needed for my 1-minute muffins.  I am going to make one tomorrow chock-full of fresh blueberries that I got at Trader Joe's yesterday.  I have a sliced banana in the freezer for banana soft-serve "ice cream" later.

I also had a great chat today at Blog to Lose - a great place to visit.  Wonderful support, and now they have started with scheduled chats.  I left chat all re-inspired to stay on program, along with some great tips (including the reminder about the banana soft-serve, which I had forgotten all about!).

On the exercise front - I did absolutely NOTHING.  But I suppose that's allowed :) .  Once in a while....

One of the tips I got from chat today was to post my next day's meals on a white board on the fridge (which I happen to have!).  What I liked about doing that was not the posting itself, but it really forced me to sit for a few quiet minutes after dinner to think about what I would like to have tomorrow.  As I mentioned in yesterday's post I have almost TOO many choices in this house - and of course I would like to eat it - all at once!  So planning out the day is a good way to make sure I allow myself everything that I enjoy eating.

Stay warm (it's a virtual heatwave here - it's up to 28 degrees!) --

Miriam

So much food ... so little time

Because I have tomorrow (Monday) off I didn't have my usual frenzy of grocery shopping and cooking before the sun goes down on Sunday.  But - I still did grocery shop for the week.  I am trying so hard not to over-buy, but I really am not able to go again during the week so I have to really do a close estimate of what will get me through to the following Saturday, including fresh foods like vegetables and fruits.

I thought I was perfectly planning - but then we landed up making extra things today (not to mention that my husband brought home a half of cooked chicken from the restaurant, and I had forgotten I had an entire meal leftover from salmon and sweet potatoes).  Not to worry... I didn't overstock too badly.

I did get ingredients for a new soup I never tried: Italian-inspired vegetable soup.  This might require a WW eTools membership to get to, and if so and you can't get there, just let me tell you it uses escarole, fennel, spinach, fire-roasted diced tomatoes, and all sorts of other goodies.  I'm very happy with the soup I've been making for several weeks, but I figured it wouldn't hurt to try something new.  I also didn't make my stuffed cabbage casserole (another thing I've been making every week for 3-4 weeks - it's a great take-along for lunch).  My husband made some sort of marvelous stuffed chicken breasts for dinner (stuffed with fresh spinach, rice, almonds, onions, red peppers, and I don't know what else) and while those are baking I have chicken thighs marinating that I will bake for me to use on salads all week.

If anyone lives near a Trader Joe's their BIG boxes of blueberries are in (for $5.99) so I got two of those, as well as 1/2 dozen packages of assorted greens for salads.  OH MY.  I just cannot control myself in a supermarket.  Giant cantaloupes are $2.99 but I am going to send my husband in to get those - he has a knack for picking melons that will ripen before they rot!

Anyway - I hope all this marvelous fresh produce will find its way to fit into my eating program.  The problem is not that I won't eat all that wonderful food, but that I will also dip into all the football snacks I bought for my husband and son!  I'm going to clean my bedroom today while the games are on and hopefully they will finish everything before I see the light of day.

Got up this morning and my knee was just fine!!!!!!!!!!!  I'm so happy.  No ill effects from the dancing yesterday.  Maybe things are looking up.  FINALLY.  Now if I could just drop these extra 50 pounds I'm carrying, I'm sure my other knee will feel better as well.

Enjoy the rest of your day - it's sunny and gorgeous here... I'll take the 8 degrees :) --- at least no snow!!!

Miriam

First class of the new semester

Well my belly dance class started this morning.  I changed the time to 10AM (from 9:30AM) so I could go to my favorite WW meeting in the morning.  I still have to leave early at 9:30 - this leader has meetings that go more than an hour (they start at 9 and rarely end before 10), but it was nice to be part of a meeting I enjoy - even if I had to leave early.  I didn't get on the scale this week so nothing to report, but I had a lot of NSVs this week and am pleased.

So my first class of the new session began.  My goal is to be able to do the full drill with them.  I made it maybe 3/4 of the way through ).  But I realized something that I am NOT happy about - my arms were exhausted and I couldn't keep them up and had to dance with them down by my side.  Because I haven't been dancing I also haven't been working my arms.  I am going to start tonight with light weights.  It's unbelievable how heavy your arms are just by their own weight!  During the performance class I also danced a little bit.  We have a recital on March 31st, and I am seriously toying with doing a 5-minute piece.  Most of my students have never seen me perform (they take lessons with me on faith because of my reputation) and they have been so understanding of my limitations all these years (they have seen me not only through my knee replacement, but also rotator cuff surgery a year prior to that... never mind the tendinitis in my feet - boy I'm a mess!) so dancing at the recital is as much for them as it would be for me.

I came home and slept for an hour.  I was beat!  BUT ---- MY KNEE FEELS FINE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Prior to surgery I would have to ice and elevate the rest of the day, even if I had barely danced in class.  So - for the FIRST time I am really confident I made the right decision!  HOORAY!!!!!!!!!!!!

So now that I am napped and rested I am gong to make my grocery list for the week.  Even though it's dark already I might go out and do half my shopping so I don't have to do it all tomorrow.  On the other hand, I have to remember that I have Monday off so there isn't the usual rush to do all my shopping on Saturday and all my cooking on Sunday.  Maybe I'll actually just sit and relax the rest of the night... whatta concept!

Enjoy your weekend everyone, and if you have Monday off, enjoy it extra special!

Miriam

Interesting....

I had my teeth cleaned this morning - I have the same hygienist for over 10 years, so we tend to chat personal stuff when I come in for my appointment.  Anyway, she was asking me how my knee is going, and I told her that for 8 months out, I'm a little disappointed, but I know I still have to be patient.  Well... she told me about someone who works there who had her knee done in June, and has not been happy at all so she went to another doctor and that doctor said that in his opinion, the implant that was put in is too big.  I'm not even going there....  I had a top-notch doctor in the world's top orthopedic hospital do my surgery so I'm not going to second-guess anything.  I think you can go down a very slippery - and unhappy - slope when you do something like that.  Besides, all she found out was that if she wants a smaller implant she has to do the surgery all over again.  I can't imagine going through that again - for no guaranteed results.  Besides, I think MY implant is just fine -

So a recap - I am not in any pain!  My endurance being on my feet is great, although after too long ("too long" defined as maybe more than an hour) I can feel a little swelling.  Everyday when I use my bike it takes me at least 5 minutes before I can go around without saying "ouch" at every revolution.  My doctor had told me that repetitive movement like the bike riding breaks up the swelling and moves things along.  I will just be happy when I can get on the bike and immediately not feel uncomfortable. I still do feel pain during the night, and I still do have the "scraped" feeling under the skin.   In case I have any doubts I think back to the pain I was in - where I couldn't be on my feet 10 minutes, let alone an hour.  My belly dance classes begin next week and my goal is to be able to do the full 12-minute drill with them.  I was able to do about half of it when classes broke for Christmas.

Weight-wise... stayed the same last week.  I actually have an appointment with an endocrinologist in February.  I have a few problems (among them slow-to-no weight loss no matter what I do) that normally would indicate thyroid problems, but my thyroid is fine.  It might be a hormone problem or a mis-functioning gland somewhere.  I am sure it's nothing serious, but hopefully if he can get to the bottom of other things that are happening, he can get to the bottom of why weight loss is NOT happening. 

I have lost 4 pounds in 4 weeks, which is nothing to sneeze at, since the party line is that a safe loss is anywhere between 1/2 and 2 pounds a week.  However, it's just part and parcel of other things going on.  We shall see.....

Back to the knee, though - I had written about my Frankenstein walk.  This week I am starting to train myself to do glamor walking.  That is, head up, leading with the chest, feet barely skimming the ground.  I even put a sway in my hips today, which I don't normally do, but I'm trying to get a feminine stride going instead of walking like a Sumo wrestler.

Okay - back to work!  Have a great day everyone!
Miriam